hahahahaa
I just had an interesting conversation with a friend (whose name I shall not reveal). She was asking me how to change the "carcass" of her printer.
- Me: "You mean 'cartridge'? 'Carcass' is a dead body."
- Her: "Oh, yeah, cartridge! But a dead body is a 'cork'."
- Me: "'Cork'? You mean 'corpse'?"
- Her: "Uh, yeah."
HAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!! I LOVE YOU! You're too funny....muah! What else? Exams are over. Finally!!! I've done quite badly in everything. Ugh. Chemistry was by far the worst. The question paper might as well have been in Chinese for all that I understood of it. Anyway, I shall be happy not knowing my marks until school starts again. So thats that. What else do I have to say?? Nothing much really. I'm back to being confused about life. What do I do? I'm starting to seriously doubt whether I'll pass my board exams. So now, I'm looking for alternate career options. So far, I've got autorickshaw driver (the problem being that I don't know how to drive) and onyx box cleaner (which I think I can eliminate as a friend of mine told me that only people who have passed their 12th standard qualify). So...sigh...anyone, everyone...I need suggestions!!!! Major doubt - why exactly do we have to do this bukwaas project for the board? The whole thing is for 5 marks. I mean...hello! Please! We spend hours slogging over it - doing the experiments and writing a book about it. And all that work for 3 marks, the other 2 marks being for viva. For God's sake!!! Other than academics, I'm still joyful :-) Feeling excited/nervous/sad/nostalgic/a million other things as the end of my school life draws closer and closer. I'm terribly upset about leaving school, and I know I'm going to miss it like MAD, but I can't help feeling excited about stepping out into the world. The REAL world. I don't know where I'll be and what I'll be doing with me life seven months from today. Its a very crucial decision and I hope I make a good one. K. Extremely random post. Sorry...please comment!! Love you all...!
blahness
Did you know that the name of the phobia of long words is Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?
I found that too funny...
Bio was...hahaha...quite weird. Really vague paper. Its possible that I've done decently. On the other hand, its equally possible that I've done miserably. So...we'll see.
Tomorrow chem - 11 chapters. Aargh!!! Anyone who has actually passed 12th standard...please tell me. How are you supposed to study organic chemistry? Its so completely pointless. Even if you spend hours on it, you never end up knowing anything. Stupid bukwaas. And the best part is that the whole of organic chem is only for 7 marks in the board. But you still can't chuck it. Irritating....
Anyway...
Anyone and everyone who has ever set foot into Chennai has seen at least a few of the fantastic signboards and profoundly named stores here. Here are a few signs that I've seen or heard of that are just hilarious...
1. At an AC Veg Restaurant: The manager has personally passed all the water served here
2. At a Hotel : Visitors are expected to complain here between 9 an 11 AM daily.
3. At a Dry Cleaner's Shop : Drop your trousers here for best results!
4. At a washroom in a restaurant : To stop drip, turn cock to the right
5. At a tailors shop : Ladies may have a fit upstairs
6. Detour Sign: Stop : Drive sideways
7.Clothing Shop Entrance : Here speeching English
8.Notice in a Bar : Customers are requested not to have children in the bar
9. Doctor's Office : Specialist in women and other diseases
10. In front of a public toilet : Uranals Hir
I love Chennai!!!!!!!!!!
smart answers to stupid questions
Bang-sewer, everyone! Exams start on monday and here I am, blogging away. Im such a fool. Anyway...I was telling a friend of mine about some of the questions we NRIs were asked in the US by the brainiest of brainy people there. And the answers we provided. Quite funny, actually. And all of you know how sweet I am (*wide grin*). So here they are for you. FAQs
1. Q: Do you speak Hindu?
A: Yes. I also speak Muslim and Christian. I know a bit of Jewish. I'm multi-lingual, you see...
2. Q: Are you a Hindi?
A: (try and guess....)
3. Q: What's that dot on your head?
A: In India, archery is practiced very commonly. Women wear a dot on their foreheads so that their husbands can practice their aim properly.
4. Q: Are there elephants in India?
A: Of course! In fact, there are so many elephants that people don't use cars. Elephants are the most widely used means of transportation, though they are rather expensive to maintain.
5. Q: Is there a lot of tea in India?
A: Yeah. There's so much tea that people are constantly drinking tea. And since its so hot there, water boils spontaneously. So people don't even need a stove to make tea. The tea can be made sitting on the road with a glass of water and some tea teaves. In fact, people don't drink much water in India. They drink only tea.
6. Q: Is it true that most Indians have pet tigers and snakes?
A: (need I bother?)
And so on...
Pretty good fun. There are actually many more such questions, but I should go study. Will blog later. Please comment....
Much love...
Written In High School Essays
Hey everyone. Here's a foward a got. Some stuff thats actually been written in high school essays. Its damn funny. Take a look.
- Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
- His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
- He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
- She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
- She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
- Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
- He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
- The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
- McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
- Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
- The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
- Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19p.m. at a speed of 35mph.
- They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.
- John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
- He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.
- The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
- The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
- He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
- The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
- It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
- He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
- Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
- She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
Too good no? K will blog later.
Much love!
